I’ll Drink to That

 

I’ll Drink to That!

A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”

With even greater emphasis he said, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”

And then finally, he said, “And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.” He sat down.

The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, “For our closing song, let us sing Hymn # 365:

“Shall We Gather at the River.”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

 

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The Greek Priest

 

A Greek priest is driving down to New York to see a show, and he’s stopped in Connecticut for speeding.

The state trooper smells alcohol on his breath, sees an empty wine bottle on the floor, and asks, “Sir, have you been drinking?”

The minister replies, “Just water.”

The trooper asks, “Then, why do I smell wine?”

The minister looks down at the bottle and exclaims, “Good Lord, He’s done it again!”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

Photography Prints

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

Signs on Church Property

religious jokes to make you laugh your head off.

Signs on Church Property

“No God — No Peace. Know God — Know Peace.”
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“Free Trip to Heaven. Details Inside!”
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An ad for St.Joseph’s Episcopal Church has a picture of two hands  holding stone tablets on which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads, “For fast, fast, fast relief, take two tablets.”
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“People are like tea bags — you have to put them in hot water before you know how strong they are.”
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“God so loved the world that He did not send a committee.”
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“When down in the mouth, remember Jonah. He came out alright.”
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“Fight truth decay — study the Bible daily.”
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“Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives”
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“Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the  pay is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world.”
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“Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church.”
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“If you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns.”
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“If you don’t like the way you were born, try being born again.”
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“Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire insurance soon.”
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“This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?” ———> (U R)
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“Forbidden fruit creates many jams.”
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“In the dark? Follow the Son.”
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“If you can’t sleep, don’t count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd.”

More jokes on my website.

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

Clinton Meets the Pope

 

Clinton Meets the Pope

During his visit to the United States the Pope met with President Clinton. Instead of just an hour as scheduled, the meeting went on for two days.

Finally, a weary President Clinton emerged to face the waiting news media. The President was smiling and announced the summit was a resounding success.

He said he and the Pope agreed on 80% of the matters they discussed.

Then Mr. Clinton declared he was going home to the White House to be with his family.

A few minutes later the Pope came out to make his statement.

He looked tired, discouraged and was practically in tears. Sadly he announced
his meeting with the President was a failure.

Incredulous, one reporter asked, “But your Holiness, President Clinton just announced the summit was a great success and the two of you agreed on 80% of the items discussed”.

Exasperated, the Pope answered, “Yes, but we were talking about the Ten Commandments.”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

In Trouble In Church: Life In the Fifties

 

 

After or during these socials, as well as in church we boys could always find trouble, seems as if it was lurking around every corner. As I grew older, mom became less willing to let me sit with other boys, not sure why.

One particular Sunday, Kenny and I were sitting in the back of the church behind a bachelor that was inclined to fall asleep. He had a habit of resting his head on his hand with his elbow firmly planted on the church pew. Sure enough, his head began to nod about halfway through the sermon.

One can only resist the urge so long, suddenly and without warning, I found my right index finger firmly lodged beside his elbow, one sudden jerk and it would be mission accomplished.

The unintended consequences were that his head hit the church pew and resulted in a sound that was heard throughout the church. 

I knew I was in trouble when mom turned around and glared at me. 

The next few Sundays, I sat quietly next to mom.

Gary has been a writer/photographer for over thirty years. Specializing in nature and landscape photography, as well as studying native cultures.

His travels have taken him to most of the United States, as well as Australia, Belize, Egypt and the Canary Islands.

He has studied the Mayan culture of Central America as well as the aborigines of Australia. Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in various parts of the world.

He has published several books about his adventures.

For more information, please consult his website,www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments are welcome

The little Boy and the Wedding

A little boy was in a relative’s wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd(alternating between bride’s side and groom’s side).

While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar…so it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR all the way down the aisle.

As you can imagine, the crowd was near tears from laughing so hard by the time he reached the pulpit. The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed from all the laughing and was also near tears by the time he reached the pulpit.

When asked what he was doing, the child sniffed and said, “I was being the Ring Bear…”

Gary has been a writer/photographer for over thirty years. Specializing in nature and landscape photography, as well as studying native cultures.

His travels have taken him to most of the United States, as well as Australia, Belize, Egypt and the Canary Islands.

He has studied the Mayan culture of Central America as well as the aborigines of Australia. Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in various parts of the world.

He has published several books about his adventures.

For more information, please consult his website,www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments are welcome

Same Sex Marriage

 

 

Same Sex Marriage   One of the big controversies of the day is same sex marriage. It seems everyone has an opinion and for many their opinion changes with the wind.

  Many people originally oppose it, but when they hear others come out in favor of it, they jump on the bandwagon wanting to be part of the “IN” crowd without thinking about all the unintended consequences.  

Once you stop defining marriage as between one man and one woman you start down a slippery slope.

Soon bigamy and polygamy will be legal, after that marriage to animals will follow. There isn’t any thing you can do to deny those possibilities once you break down the barrier and redefine marriage.

Gary has been a writer/photographer for over thirty years. Specializing in nature and landscape photography, as well as studying native cultures.

His travels have taken him to most of the United States, as well as Australia, Belize, Egypt and the Canary Islands.

He has studied the Mayan culture of Central America as well as the aborigines of Australia. Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in various parts of the world.

He has published several books about his adventures.

For more information, please consult his website,www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments are welcome