You Know You’ve Had Too Much of the 90s if

You Know You’ve Had Enough of the 90’s When…

…you tried to enter your password on the microwave.
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…you now think of three espressos as “getting wasted.”
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…you haven’t played solitaire with a real deck of cards in years.
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…you have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
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…you e-mail your son in his room to tell him that dinner is ready, and he e-mails you back “What’s for dinner?”
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…your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies via her web site.
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…you chat several times a day with a stranger from South Africa, but you haven’t spoken to your next door neighbor yet this year.
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…you didn’t give your valentine a card this year, but you posted one for your e-mail buddies via a web page.
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…your daughter just bought a C.D. of all the records your college roommate used to play.
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…you check your blow dryer to see if it’s Y2K compliant.
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…your grandmother clogs up your e-mail Inbox, asking you to send her JPEG files of your newborn so she can create a screen saver.
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…you pull up in your own driveway and use your cellphone to see if anyone is home.

photo fo two people, a child and an adult looking at a sunset over the ocean

Life was a lot slower and simpler in the fifties and sixties.

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

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My Kid Said That

 

 

One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was “acting up” during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to
maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally the father picked the little fellow up and walked
sternly up the aisle on his way out. Just before reaching the safety of the foyer the little one called loudly to the congregation,
“Pray for me! Pray for me!”
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A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer “Dear Harold”.        At this, dad interrupted and said, “Wait a minute, How come you called God, ‘Harold'”? The little boy looked up and said, “That’s what they call Him in church. You know the prayer we say, “Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name.”
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And this particular four-year-old prayed: “And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.”
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During the minister’s prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistle from one of the back pews. Gary’s mother was horrified. She pinched him into silence, and after church, asked: “Gary, whatever made you do such a thing?” Gary answered soberly: “I asked God to teach me to whistle…
And He just then did!”
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One night Mike’s parents overheard this prayer. “Now I lay me down to rest, and hope to pass tomorrow’s test, if I should die before I wake, that’s one less test I have to take.”
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A five-year-old said grace at family dinner one night. “Dear God, thank you for these pancakes.” When he concluded, his parents asked him why he thanked God for pancakes when they were having chicken. He smiled and said, “I thought I’d see if He was paying attention tonight.”
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A little boy’s prayer. “Dear God, please take care of my daddy and my mommy and my sister and my brother and my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we’re gonna be in a big mess.”
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A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy: “So your mother says your prayers for you each night? Very commendable. What does she say?” The little boy replied, “Thank God he’s in bed!”
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A woman invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, “Would you like to say the blessing?” I wouldn’t know what to say,” the little girl replied. “Just say what you hear Mommy say, ” the mother said. The little girl bowed her head and said, “Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?
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Johnny had been misbehaving and was sent to his room. After a while he emerged and informed his mother that he had thought it over and then said a prayer. “Fine,” said the pleased mother. “If you ask God to help you not misbehave, He will help you.” “Oh, I didn’t ask Him to help me not misbehave,” said Johnny. “I asked Him to help you put up with me.”
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A little boy was overheard praying: “Lord, if You can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am!”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

The Tooth Fairy

Photography Prints

 

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my four-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various necessary appliances, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs.

One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass.

As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, The tooth fairy will never believe this!”

photo fo two people, a child and an adult looking at a sunset over the ocean

Life was a lot slower and simpler in the fifties and sixties.

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

The Birthday Present

photo of aboriginal rock art

Ancient aboriginal rock art

What, No Birthday Present?

A Jewish gentleman, fresh out of gift ideas, bought his mother-in-law a large plot in an expensive cemetery.

On her next birthday, he bought her nothing. She was quick to comment loud and long on his thoughtlessness.

“Well, you haven’t used the gift I gave you last year.”

Memories from yesteryear

photo fo two people, a child and an adult looking at a sunset over the ocean

Life was a lot slower and simpler in the fifties and sixties.

The blogger has been a writer/photographer for over thirty years. Specializing in nature and landscape photography, as well as studying native cultures.

His travels have taken him to most of the United States, as well as Australia, Belize, Egypt and the Canary Islands.

He has studied the Mayan culture of Central America as well as the aborigines of Australia. Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in various parts of the world.

He has published several books about his adventures.

For more information, please consult his website,www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments are welcome

Saving Hillary

Sell Art Online

 

Hillary Clinton was out jogging one morning along the parkway when she tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the
creek below.

Before the Secret Service guys could get to her, 3 kids who were fishing pulled her out of the water. She was so grateful
she offered the kids whatever they wanted.

The first kid says, “I want to go to Disneyland.”

 Hillary says, “No problem, I’ll take you there on my special senator’s airplane”

The second kid says, “I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan’s.”

Hilary says, “I’ll get them for you and even have Michael sign them!!”

The third kid says, “I want a motorized wheelchair with a built-in TV and stereo headset!”

Hilary is a little perplexed by this and says, “But you don’t look like you’re handicapped.”

The kid says, “I will be after my dad finds out I saved your butt from drowning!!!

photo of young living oils

Improve your health through essential oils and Isagenix.

The blogger has been a writer/photographer for over thirty years. Specializing in nature and landscape photography, as well as studying native cultures.

His travels have taken him to most of the United States, as well as Australia, Belize, Egypt and the Canary Islands.

He has studied the Mayan culture of Central America as well as the aborigines of Australia. Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in various parts of the world.

He has published several books about his adventures.

For more information, please consult his website,www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments are welcome

photo fo two people, a child and an adult looking at a sunset over the ocean

Life was a lot slower and simpler in the fifties and sixties.

Laws for the 21st Century

Sell Art Online

Laws For 21st Century Life

Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you’ll have to pee.

Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.

Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now.

Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don’t want to be seen with.

Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won’t work, it will.

Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

Theatre Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.

Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

Murphy’s Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich of landing face down on a floor covering are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet/rug.

Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don’t know what you are talking about.

Brown’s Law: If the shoe fits, it’s really ugly.

Wilson’s Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it, or change it for the worse.

 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website, http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

Your comments appreciated

alcohol

In today’s world, many resort to abusing drugs and alcohol, why are so many becoming addicted and not only destroying their lives but the lives of others around them ?

 

Telephone Jokes

Q. What do you get when you cross a telephone with a pair of pants?
A. Bell-bottoms!

Q. How is a telephone like a dirty bathtub?
A. They both have rings!

Q. What happened to the little frog who sat on the telephone?
A. He grew up to be a bellhop!

Q. What do you get if you cross a telephone with an iron?
A. A smooth operator!

Q. What do you call a large person who constantly calls up people, pretending to be somebody else?
A. A big phone-y!

Q. Why didn’t the skeleton need a telephone?
A. He had no body to talk with!

Q. How does a cheerleader answer the phone?
A. H-E-L-L-O!

Q. What do you get if you cross a phone with a pair of glasses?
A. A television.

Q. What is the cheapest time to call your friends long distance?
A. When they’re not home!

Q. How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls?
A. Collect!

Q. What do you get if you cross a phone with a birthday celebration?
A. A party line!

Q. How does a barber make phone calls?
A. He cuts them short.

Q. Why didn’t the mummy want a telephone?
A. He always got too wrapped up in his calls!

Now you can follow me on Kindle


Free Grocery Coupons

 

 Gary has been a writer/ photographer for over 20 years, specializing in nature,landscapes and studying native cultures.Besides visiting most of the United States, he has traveled to such places as Egypt,the Canary Islands,much of the Caribbean. He has studied  the Mayan Cultures in Central America, and the Australian Aboriginal way of life.Photography has given him the opportunity to observe life in many different parts of the world!

He has published several books about the various cultures he has observed.

For more information and a link to his hard cover and Ebooks,and contact information: please check his website.www.commonsensejourneys.com

Your comments appreciated

schoolhouse

 

Art Prints