The Easter Bunny and Easter Sunday

 

When I was a small pup and began to realize that everything I was being told may not be true, I began to have serious doubts concerning the Easter Bunny.

At the time, I was growing up on a small Midwestern farm. We had cows, horses, turkeys, chickens and pet rabbits.

In my then limited experience, I had seen rabbits give birth several times, and consequently, had never seen one lay an egg.

I didn’t say much, I kind of liked the tradition and all the candy and hard boiled eggs that Mr. Easter Bunny left. I wasn’t going to mess that up, even though the tradition really didn’t make much sense.

Sometimes it is best to just leave sleeping dogs lie.

As time went by, I began to realize there may be a method to the madness.

In ancient cultures, the egg often symbolized a rebirth, in ancient Sumeria there was a spring festival resembling Easter. It was the barley harvest festival, a celebration of the harvesting of the barley by giving thanks to the creator for a bountiful harvest.

From what I understand the egg symbolized  rebirth in Sumerian culture because a live chicken would eventually emerge from the egg, thus symbolizing rebirth.

I still haven’t a clue how the bunny enters into this equation, unless because the bunny reproduces in large quantities, it may symbolize a plentiful harvest.

I’m not even sure if there were bunnies in Sumeria.

Ah, the mystery continues.

That may be one of Hugh Heffner’s marketing ploys.

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

 

 

 

 

 

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Do You Believe in Hell

 

A young lady came home from a date, rather sad. She told her mother, “Jeff proposed to me an hour ago.”

“Then why are you so sad?” her mother asked.

“Because he also told me he was an atheist. Mom, he doesn’t even believe there’s a hell.”

Her mother said, “Marry him anyway. Between the two of us, we’ll show him how wrong he is.”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

My Kid Said That

 

When my daughter was about four years old, she still had a hard time grasping the concept of marriage. But anyway, I got out our wedding album, thinking visual images would help, and explained the entire service to her. Once finished, I asked if she had any questions, and she replied, “Oh. I see. Is that when Mommy came to work for us?”
*
A mother took her three-year-old daughter to church for the first time. The church lights were lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying lighted candles. All was quiet until the little one started to sing in a loud voice, “Happy Birthday to you, happy birthday to you……”
*
After listening restlessly to a long and tedious sermon, a 6-year- old boy asked his father what the preacher did the rest of the week.
“Oh he’s a very busy man,” the father replied. “He takes care of church business, visits the sick, ministers to the poor…. And then he has to have time to rest up. Talking in public isn’t an easy job, you know.
“The boy thought about that, then said, “Well, listening ain’t easy, either.”
*
At the beginning of a children’s sermon, one girl came up to the altar wearing a beautiful dress. As the children are sitting down around the pastor, the pastor leans over and says to the girl, “That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter dress?” The girl replies almost directly into the pastor’s clip-on mike, “Yes…. and my Mom says it’s a
bitch to iron.”
*
I had been teaching my three-year-old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord’s Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime she repeated it after me. One night she said she was ready to solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer.
“Lead us not into temptation,” she prayed, “but deliver us some e-mail. Amen.”
*
A mother was watching her four-year-old child playing outside in a small plastic pool half filled with water. He was happily walking back and forth across the pool, making big splashes. Suddenly, he stopped, stepped out of the pool, and began to scoop water out of the pool with a pail. “Why are you pouring the water out, Johnny?” the mother asked.
“‘Cause my teacher said Jesus walked on water, and this water won’t work.” The boy replied.
*
FMC member Pastor Stan Holdeman of Garden Baptist Church in Indiana went to an informal church gathering, wearing shorts and a T-shirt. A little girl from a newly religious family; who had seen him only in his Sunday morning suits loudly proclaimed: “Hey, preacher, you sure look different with clothes on!”
*
After church one Sunday morning, a mother commented: “The choir was awful this morning.” The father commented: “The sermon was too long.”
Their 7-yr. old daughter added: “You’ve got to admit it was a pretty good show for a dime.”
*
A four-year-old Catholic boy was playing with a four-year-old Protestant girl in a children’s pool in the backyard. They splashed each other, got very wet and decided to take their wet clothes off. The little boy looked at the little girl and said, “Golly, I didn’t know there was that much difference between Catholics and Protestants.”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

Theme Songs For Bible Characters

 

Noah: “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head”
*
Adam and Eve: “Strangers in Paradise”
*
Lazarus: “The Second Time Around”
*
Esther: “I Feel Pretty”
*
Job: “I’ve Got a Right to Sing the Blues”
*
Moses: “The Wanderer”
*
Jezebel: “The Lady is a Tramp”
*
Samson: “Hair”
*
Salome: “I Could Have Danced All Night”
*
Daniel: “The Lion Sleeps Tonight”
*
Joshua: “Good Vibrations”
*
Peter: “I’m Sorry”
*
Esau: “Born To Be Wild”
*
Jeremiah: “Take This Job and Shove It”
*
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abendego: “Great Balls of Fire!”
*
The Three Kings: “When You Wish Upon a Star”
*
Jonah: “Got a Whale of a Tale”
*
Elijah: “Up, Up, and Away”
*
Methuselah: “Stayin’ Alive”
*
Nebuchadnezzar: “Crazy”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

 

Word IMperfect

 

This is an allegedly true story from the WordPerfect help line. Needless to say the help desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for “Termination without Cause”.

Actual dialogue of a former Wordperfect Customer Support employee:

“Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?”
“Yes, I need help … I’m having trouble with my computer.”
“What sort of trouble?”
“Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away.”
“Went away?”
“They disappeared.”
“Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?”
“Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
“It’s blank; it won’t accept anything when I type.”
“Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?”
“How do I tell?”
“Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?”
“What’s a sea-prompt?”
“Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?”
“There isn’t any cursor: I told you, it won’t accept anything I type.”
“Does your monitor have a power indicator?”
“What’s a monitor?”
“It’s the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a
little light that tells you when it’s on?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?”
“Yes, I think so.”
“Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it’s plugged into the wall.”
“…….Yes, it is.”
“When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?”
“No.”
“Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable.”
“……. Okay, here it is.”
“Follow it for me, and tell me if it’s plugged securely into the back of your computer.”
“I can’t reach.”
“Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?”
“No.”
“Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?”
“Oh, it’s not because I don’t have the right angle – it’s because it’s dark.”
“Dark?”
“Yes -the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window.”
“Well, turn on the office light then.”
“I can’t.”
“No? Why not?”
“Because there’s a power outage.”
“A power… A power outage? Aha, Okay, we’ve got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?”
“Well, yes, I keep them in the closet.”
“Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from.”
“Really? Is it that bad?”
“Yes, I’m afraid it is.”
“Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?”
“Tell them you’re too stupid to own a computer.”

Some really good jokes!

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

Grand Turk

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

A Death in the Family

 

A Death in the Family

A Pastor went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule in the church yard. He called the police. Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the pastor to the health department.

They said since there was no health threat that he should call the sanitation department. The manager said he could not pick up the mule without authorization from the mayor.

Now the pastor knew the mayor and was not to eager to call him. The mayor had a bad temper and was generally hard to deal with, but the pastor called him anyway.

The mayor did not disappoint him. He immediately began to rant and rave at he pastor and finally said, “Why did you call me any way? Isn’t it your job to bury the dead?”

The pastor paused for a brief prayer and asked the Lord to direct his response. Then, he replied “Yes, Mayor, it is my job to bury the dead, but I always like to notify the next of kin first!”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.

Elijah

 

Elijah

The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal.
She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it  cut the steer in pieces and laid it upon the altar.

And then Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times.

“Now, said the teacher, “can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?”

A little girl in the back of the room raised her hand with great enthusiasm. “To make the gravy.”

Growing up on a dairy farm in southeastern Indiana, Gary traveled very little until midlife, when the opportunity became available to him.

Grabbing his camera and a bag full of equipment, he began his vision quest traveling to most areas of the United States and several countries abroad.

Along the way he collected several thousand photographs that he wants to share with everyone.

http://www.travelnsnap.com

Gary decided the best way to accomplish his goal was to publish photo documentaries on the various areas of the world he has visited.

photo of Sturgeon Point lighthouse

Michigan, the Wolverine State

What will follow will be several photography books, who knows how many will wind up in his collection.

To contact Gary:

journeysthrulife@gmail.com.

http://www.journeysthrulife.com.